The Value of Beauty

As the year comes to a close, I like to look back and consider things I learned, what stood out as important, and use it as a framework for the coming year. Two things stood out to me in 2024; I’ll address one here and one in this post.

I am somewhere between minimalist and hoarder.

While I don’t love little trinkets and figures displayed on shelves that will need to be dusted on rotation, I also don’t love the sparceness of nothing. The empty walls and shelves half filled with books, spine facing in {seriously, who started that trend and can we please stop?!}.

I am also sentimental so keeping things is important to me too. The few things I have on display are from special people or certain times in my life. The minimal clutter they cause is worth it to me because of the memory associated with it.

And in those simple things — memories, experiences, creation — we can find beauty. There’s many different definitions of what is beautiful or what makes something beautiful. And we pair that adjective with many different things: nature, architecture, music, people, food. When we use “beautiful” to describe something we are, in a way, assigning value to it. That walk at sunset was worth it or is worth remembering because of it’s beauty.

I’m afraid sometimes in our modern desire for minimalism, we leave beauty in the dust. Our buildings are built to be efficient, not to inspire wonder. Our furnishings and fashions are designed according to trends, not for beauty.

On our trip to France, I was astounded at the beauty everywhere we looked. The gardens were designed with precision, the stained glass in the churches told stories, the columns of buildings were perfect down to the smallest detail. Even something like a staircase, practical and needed, was carved with intricate designs. I appreciated many things about that trip but the need to slow down to really see everything taught me a lesson about beauty. It’s not something to be rushed by or glanced at. Beauty is to be savored.

Our drive to minimalism and the rush to do everything has kept us from the joy of beauty. We are in too big a hurry to slow down and appreciate what we see and experience. We discard the old for the sleek minimalism of new. Sure, we still use “beautiful” to describe things but is it a hasty use of the word because we can’t stop to think of anything else to say? When did we last pause to consider the true beauty of something?

Whether in God’s creation or something man has made with the talents God gave, beauty in its many forms should make us delay in our rush. We should linger in front of that painting and consider the brushstrokes, we should reread that sentence of perfectly melded words, we should put our fork down between bites and savor our meal.

God could have given us a world in gray tones and beige. Yet he filled it with beauty; he gave us the ability to design and appreciate it. The senses to experience beauty in multiple ways. What a gift!

Photo by JOHN TOWNER on Unsplash

Consistently Faithful

Why is faithfulness so difficult?

I believe most Christians would say they want to live a faithful life, serving Christ over the long haul. But I think if we were honest, we sometimes think more about the razzle dazzle of service than what faithful living really looks like.

We read missionary biographies and marvel at the adventures and answered prayers. We follow social media Christian influences who travel and speak and do all the “cool things” of serving others on a large platform. We have our favorite teachers and musicians and think they are living in ultimate service for God. If only we could have a portion of that excitement in our lives!

Instead, we moan over the routine and daily grind of where we are. Social media certainly doesn’t help as we see the vacations, ministries, parties, and activities of sometimes friends, sometimes random people we follow. But that is such an incomplete view of someone’s life and faithfulness! Online is definitely a curated place, not meant for true authenticity.

Just like we don’t see the hours of practice for athletes and musicians, we don’t see the everyday moments that create a faithful lifetime.

I believe a big part of this mentality is the “now” mindset about everything. Food, internet, movies, entertainment. Our society thrives off of the immediate gratification movement. It’s not worth doing/having if you have to wait. We want it and we want it now! But this mindset and faithfulness aren’t compatible.

The Hebrew word conveys the idea of stability and trustworthiness. Neither of those can be proven in the short term. It takes time and familiarity to be known as trustworthy. It takes day in and day out living to show you are stable in how you live and what you believe.

Consistency is not a fast and flashy lifestyle. It is small moments, unseen moments, doing what is right and necessary and needed, even if no one ever knows.

Glenna Marshall is the author of “Everyday Faithfulness”* which I highly recommend. Here are a few of my favorite quotes:

“Today’s efforts aren’t just for today! They’re for tomorrow and next week and next month and five years from now.” {p23}

“Our hearts will not casually become more holy while we sit around and no nothing to feed our faithfulness.” {p28}

“Our faithfulness isn’t just for us. It announces to the world that Jesus is worth every drop of our devotion.” {p155}

Faithfulness in the Christian life is doing what we have been called to do today — tending children, meal planning, laundry, yardwork, cleaning, encouraging someone — it all matters. And it’s these small disciplines of consistency that lend to a fully faithful life.

*“Everyday Faithfulness” published by Crossway, 2020

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

What Does Giving Grace Mean?

Something I’ve been hearing a lot in recent years is, “Give them grace.” And I think some people use this phrasing to mean, “Be patient with her.” Maybe the person is a new believer and she is struggling through theological truths and you need patience as you help her. Maybe someone is walking through a trial and you need to demonstrate patience in your expectations on her during this time.

But when we consider what grace means and how it is used in the Bible, what should we be meaning when we say we’re giving grace and how do we go about actually doing that? Do grace and this idea of being patient go together? Or should we use another word?

A flip through the New Testament and we are confronted with the word “grace” many times. We probably recognize it the most for being Paul’s standard greeting in his letters {Rom 1:7; I Cor 1:3; II Cor 1:2; Gal 1:3; Eph 1:2; Phil 1:2; Col 1:2; I Thess 1:1; II Thess 1:2; I Time 1:2; II Tim 1:2; Titus 1:4; Philem 1:3} where he says, “Grace and peace.” He also closes all of his letters with “grace” {Rom 16:20; I Cor 16:23; II Cor 13:14; Gal 6:18; Eph 6:24; Phil 4:23; Col 4:18; I Thess 5:28; II Thess 3:18; I Tim 6:21; II Tim 4:22; Titus 3:15; Philem 1:25}.

So what is this grace and peace and grace of our Lord Jesus that Paul finds so important? God’s grace is what saves us from sin. Eph 2:8-9 tells us it is by grace, not works, that we are saved. I learned the definition as grace is God giving a free gift that we can never earn. Nothing we do will give us grace. God offers it because he loves us and is rich in mercy toward us {Eph 2:4-5}.

The Unger’s Bible Dictionary says, “Any intermixture of human merit violates grace” {p504}. If we try to work our way to salvation, we are saying God’s perfect grace, his gift of salvation to us, isn’t good enough. We have no part in salvation except confessing our sins and accepting the free gift of God’s grace. A note in Thayer’s Greek Lexicon states that, “Karis {the Greek word for grace} contains the idea of kindness which bestows upon one what he has not deserved” {p666}. In God’s kindness, he gives us karis; grace we don’t deserve.

When we think about peace, we think of calm, restful, quiet. But Paul isn’t merely wishing his readers a calm day. He is talking about spiritual peace, rest and confidence that comes to us because we have God’s grace. True biblical peace is not something we can fabricate. There are hundreds of things that steal our peace and only knowing and acknowledging Who controls them all will give us any semblance of rest. Note that when Paul opens his letters, he says, “Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.” {emphasis mine} He is reminding the reader that our peace comes from God, not from meditation or anything we can force. God offers grace. God gives peace.

So bringing this back to our original question, what should we mean when we say we are giving someone grace? To be consistent with what the Bible means, we are stating that we choose to show kindness to someone who doesn’t deserve it. It almost seems to have more to do with forgiveness than patience, doesn’t it? We offer grace to someone who has hurt us, we show kindness to someone who isn’t kind to us.

It’s not wrong to say, “Give them grace” but keep in mind what grace means: Unmerited favor. Undeserved kindness. What God gives us freely in salvation and what we should freely offer those around us.

Photo by Maurice DT on Unsplash

Thoughts as I Enter 40

I remember when my parents turned 40. I was 9, 10 years old and 40 seemed like an age I would never reach. Last Saturday, I turned 40.

For the last little bit, I’ve been thinking about this milestone age and what lessons I can take into the next decade. My 20s and 30s were filled with a lot of changes: getting married, moving across country, having kids, ministry life, homeschooling. And I learned a lot through all those experiences. Something about hitting a new decade made me look back and consider what to take with me.

Take time to think before you speak. As I’ve gotten older, some things seem easier, others more difficult. I remember the younger me rattling off all my thoughts, spur of the moment, never considering if there was nuance or gray areas. Everything was black and white to me; what I liked, what I disliked, right and wrong, helpful and hurtful. Age has drawn me in, brought me to moments of reflecting for days and still being hesitant to verbalize my thoughts. It’s not that my standards have changed. What I view as morally wrong and right are the same, but I’d like to think I’m more considerate in how I share my views or maybe I’m more particular about when I voice my opinion at all.

Choose your attitude. I’ve heard that one thing you can always control is your attitude. Outside pressures and perception from others, things running late or failing are usually outside our control. But we can decide how these unexpected things will affect us. Attitude matters. I think after having kids this became more apparent to me! Having a joyful or positive outlook can make even a difficult day a little better. And who doesn’t want to be around a happy person!? When I think of this in light of sanctification, it doesn’t mean we paste on a smile and never show sorrow or frustration. But it does mean that we don’t allow those circumstances to dictate how we treat people or deal with life.

Popularity does not equal value. So much of our current culture is obsessed with likes, clicks, and being viewed positively. People flock to concerts and sporting events to be able to participate in the “it moment” of right now. If you are popular you are listened to, even if you have nothing worth listening to. The more “followers” you have, the better chance of landing a book deal, TV spot, sponsorship, etc. Being popular is the idol so many are striving for. But popularity does not make a person correct, smart, informed, or kind. The world is full of interesting stories and people and experiences that are largely ignored because we don’t believe they are as valuable as the stories and thoughts of a popular person. In the life of a Christian, it shouldn’t be this way. We shouldn’t clamor for the latest and greatest in the eyes of the world. We shouldn’t judge a person’s value on what they think or contribute to society. Every life is valuable and precious, every story worth listening to.

I’m still processing, I’m still learning. It will be a lifelong pursuit and not just something for entering this decade. But I’m thankful for the opportunity and space to consider these things. And my hope is that they spur you on to think too, no matter what age you find yourself.

Photo by Bruce Tang on Unsplash

The Running List

I am a list keeper.

Even as a child before I could spell words, I would fill notebooks with lists of squiggles {ask my mom; she remembers throwing away mountains of scribbled paper}.

And once I could write, I was all about journals, lists, to-dos. When I started high school and got my first day planner, I wrote EVERYTHING down. Every assignment, every sports game I attended, who I ate lunch with…I was kind of obsessed.

With each new school year brought a new planner. August became my favorite month. And as I moved into adulthood, lists and planners followed. I have a notebook in my purse at all times, along with several colorful pens. I have a planner and lists on my desk. I keep a separate planner with lists in the schoolroom. I have scraps of paper by my bed,

I’ve found lists to be extremely helpful and use them for so much more than groceries. One of my favorite things to list {just for my own reflection} are gratitudes. The older I get, the more I realize how much there is to be thankful for. And while some of the things I list are incredibly small, the act of writing them down helps me to pay attention to things around me.

This idea isn’t new or unique to me. Books have been written about the value of cultivating thankfulness and recording them in journals or lists or photo snippets. But as with many things, you often don’t really understand the value until you put it into practice for yourself.

I list people, places, things, events, memories. I’ve found when I’m actively looking for things to be grateful for I can go on and on, much longer than I thought. And the simplicity of writing them down in a list means I can pull them out, return to those items listed, and remember to be thankful all over again, even when times are rough.

Some of my most challenging lists of gratitude were during quarantine in 2020. When you can’t leave your home, everything is cancelled, and the future looks like a big empty void {remember, I love to plan and my new planner in 2020 went from full to empty for weeks on end. It was crushing}, it wasn’t surprising that finding reasons to be thankful didn’t flow easily from my pen.

However, when I looked, when I thought and concentrated for just a few minutes, there was always something.

Health

Sunshine and a yard to enjoy when all the parks closed

Technology to see friends virtually

Food

Family games and movies

I’m sure you get the idea. There’s always something we CAN be grateful for, but sometimes it takes a little more effort and thought. And now I have list upon list of gratitudes, even for 2020.

I still have running lists — groceries, gift ideas, birthdays, projects, writing ideas, school resources — but the one that continues to help me the most is my list of thankfulness.

Photo by Paico Oficial on Unsplash

Faithfulness

We’re still in that bubble at the beginning of the year where people are envisioning and resolving and dreaming of all the possibilities that 2022 might hold. But sometimes, we struggle to take that first step. We know the end goal we want to achieve but how do we get there?

Maybe we’re afraid of doing it wrong or making a mistake or failing. Maybe we believe we need to sit back and let God work. Maybe we’re waiting for a sign that never comes so year after year we press toward the same goal but we never get any closer.

One thing I’ve learned in life is that it’s not passive. Yes, we need to be wise and sometimes steps are slow and steady instead of fast and furious. But we need to keep showing up and doing what God has called us to. Often that means just doing the next thing. And sometimes we don’t know exactly how the next thing is going to help us or serve God but we keep going.

When I was going into my last year in high school, the seniors had the option of taking one university class for credit. Most of my friends were taking History of Civilization which was a class famous for the amounts of reading you needed to do and dates you had to memorize. I wanted to do something different. I decided to take a language since I knew my major would require two years. But which language?

My mom had been working with a lady from the Ukraine and I loved how the Russian language sounded, not harsh like German but fluid, smooth. So with no reason but that, I signed up for first year Russian and bought my textbooks. I’ll be honest and say it was hard. I spent hours in the language lab after class listening to phrases and repeating them into a microphone and practicing writing in a different alphabet.

I enjoyed the class, my teacher made it interesting, but it was hard. There were times I wondered why I was doing this and if I’d made the wrong choice in choosing this class, this language. At the beginning of second semester, our teacher gave us a heads up: our final for the year would be to recite the wordless book with at least two Bible verses per section. It ended up being two pages of Russian text to memorize and we had to understand what we were saying enough to answer questions our teacher asked about the Gospel.

During this same semester, my senior class was preparing to go to New York City for a missions trip. It was a busy few months but just before finals, we loaded into buses and drove to Brooklyn. One of the afternoons, we held a children’s club at the church and we shared the Gospel message using wordless books. Just before we started, several classmates excitedly ran up to me and said there were two Russian children in the back who didn’t understand much English.

With nerves rattling, I approached and introduced myself and asked if I could explain this book without words to them in Russian. They sat by me while I slowly staggered through every section, every Bible verse I had spent the semester memorizing for my final. They left the kids club with a Russian tract, a wordless book, and the gospel. I have no idea if they ever visited the church again but a seed was planted by a very overwhelmed and nervous high schooler.

It’s an extremely humbling experience to be used by God. To take your simple efforts and things you’ve unknowingly been cultivating and have God use them in ways you never imagined. When I set out to take Russian, I never dreamed that nine months later I would be witnessing in another language to two children who knew nothing of the Gospel. When my teacher assigned us that final project to work on, I had no idea my missions team would be sharing that same material in the children’s program. But God…

I often think when we set out to make resolutions and reach our goals, we only have that in mind: our goals. Our desires. Our purposes. But how much richer our lives become when we set our priorities on God’s desires for us. What he has for us this year, this month, this day. And while we can’t anticipate everything God has for us, we can practice faithfulness, right here, where he’s placed us.

It’s impossible to know how God will use what we’re doing today for the future. But that’s okay. We don’t need to know the ends and outs of what God will do or how. We just need to be faithful where we are. We need to be praying for opportunities and studying the Bible so we know what to say when the need arises. How will you be faithful today?

Photo by Charles Black on Unsplash

Thanksgiving

It’s the week of Thanksgiving, one of my favorite times of year.

I love the food, traditions, moments of reflection, colors, decor. It’s a wonderful blend of family and friends coming together to celebrate and remember.

I always try to have an activity or craft for the kids that focuses on what they are thankful for. It’s true that once you start listing things, it’s difficult to find a stopping point! We have so many blessings, big and small, that should be remembered and rejoiced in.

For kids especially, these “I’m thankful for…” lists usually amount to their favorites. Favorite food, animals, things. It becomes a “My Favorites” list, which isn’t a bad thing; you can be thankful for your favorite things. But I was thinking, are we ever thankful for things that aren’t in that favorites list?

It’s an easy practice to think about what we love, what was fun, what went well and be thankful. But have you ever looked over the year and reflected on how the hard, difficult times and decisions changed you? I’m not saying you have to be thankful for the actual hard things themselves: illness, pain, loss, strain, etc. It might be difficult or impossible to truthfully say we are thankful for those things in our lives and situations. But maybe while walking through a hardship, you learned something about God, you found yourself focused on a certain attribute of his you’d overlooked, you memorized a Psalm that took on new meaning or significance. These are the things we can be thankful for, even after a difficult year {or two!}.

When I look back on 2021, I see a lot that frustrated me and discouraged me but I also have some wonderful memories with my family, I saw God provide financially, I grew deeper in some friendships, and learned more about empathy with others. I came to the end of my strength while dealing with constant pain and was reminded I have nothing under control, but God does.

So as you enter Thanksgiving and hopefully have time to reflect on 2021, don’t be afraid to give more than surface thanks {food, shelter, friends, etc.}. Think and pray about how God has used the good and discouraging of this year to draw you closer to himself.

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

Seek the Light

I’m not super great at houseplants.

I have good intentions. I buy indoor plants, get them in {what I think} are perfect locations, and promptly forget to water them. Or I really want a plant in a certain place that gets no sunlight and it doesn’t last long.

When my kids learn about living things in science, we talk about what living things need to survive: food, water, and for plants, sunshine. It seems like such a simple list. How hard could it be to give plants sunlight, water, and food {nutrients in soil}?

Several months ago, I wanted to do a little sprucing up in our master bathroom. Our bathroom is somewhat large with a sink, linen closet, walk-in shower, and a large tub in the corner with big windows on two sides. The toilet is in its own little closet-like room with a small window. I found some cute shelves for above the tub opposite the windows and a matching over-the-toilet storage rack with shelves.

I’d never thought about putting plants in a bathroom before but we had these great shelves and lots of natural light pouring in. It seemed like a good fit, a little spa-like. I put a few starts from my spider plant in two containers, set them on the shelves in all that light, and waited to see how long they’d last.

The thing I love about spider plants is all the viney little shoots they send out. I love how they hang and fall and fill in so much space. And before long I noticed something that really shouldn’t have surprised me. The spider plant sent out a long narrow shoot right at the window. In fact, the whole plant began leaning toward the light in such a way that I was afraid the weight would tip the pot right off the shelf! So I rotated the pot, moving the fullness of the spider plant and that first shoot away from the window and toward the bathroom.

I didn’t keep track of how long it stayed that way but one day, I noticed the plant was leaning again and sending out another shoot, again to the natural light of the sun filtering in. The plant could not be stopped in its relentless seeking of the sun, one of the things needed for its survival.

Now, I’m not getting sci-fi and suggesting that the spider plant as a will, mind, conscious. I am pointing out that God designed the plant to need certain things and grow when those needs are met. And in a weird way, the plant unknowingly seeks out what it is designed to need.

God designed people with needs also. Our needs aren’t just about survival but about thriving and glorifying our Creator. We have basic health needs {food, water, oxygen} but we also need community, encouragement, to be productive, and above all, we need God. Even people who don’t acknowledge God’s existence have a need for him. And they will feel an emptiness, a desire to fill that space with something, even if they don’t admit it.

The trouble is sin. We get so wrapped up in the things of this world that we stop really seeking after what God wants. It might start with the lie that we are too busy to read the Bible then grow to skipping church and fellowship with believers because we feel out of touch or that it’s not convenient. We stop praying because we don’t see the need.

The Christian life is not a one and done. It’s a daily pursuing of the One who Created us. Just as my spider plant will send out shoots in pursuit of the sun’s rays, we as Christians should be seeking the truth of God’s Word and leaning toward Him. We need His guidance, care, strength, and grace more than we often believe. We daily pull away from the cares of this world and seek Him, the giver of light and life.

Photo by Matti Johnson on Unsplash

Grieving but Not Alone

Last week was a sobering week for me. It marked two anniversaries that bring me to tears.

It was the eleventh anniversary of miscarrying our first baby and the first anniversary of my friend’s death from cancer.

Both of these losses left me grieving for a long time and in some ways, I still mourn. The losses were different but they affected me unexpectedly, continuously, and painfully, and even after the passing of time, it’s difficult to remember without crying.

Grief is an emotion that sometimes feels wrong. We might think if we mourn too deeply we aren’t trusting God or resting in his peace. We are allowing our fickle and sinful human nature to guide us. Therefore, we often brush by the grieving process and try to ‘get on with life’ without completely confronting how the loss tore us up inside.

I’m slowly coming to realize that grieving is not a sin, mourning someone is nothing to hide or forget. God gives us people and relationships and memories. They bring joy but there’s also a chance for pain. However, the pain doesn’t negate the happy times or how far God brings us in the healing process. I was talking with a friend who has also suffered loss and she wisely said, “People will tell you you’ll get over it but it’s not about getting over grief. It’s about just pressing forward, even with the grief.”

When my friend was diagnosed with cancer, it was difficult for me. She was a mom with children similar in age to my own and the gravity of this broken world became very evident as I saw her struggle and become weaker and deal with pain. We had scheduled a meet up and I was so excited to see her but that same day, quarantine fell on everyone. By the time quarantine ended, she was gone.

My miscarriage was sudden and the furthest possibility from my mind. I had crossed into that blessed second trimester, when the chance of miscarriage falls. But a series of ultrasounds confirmed my fears and suspicions. Going home from the doctor that Monday morning knowing I would be admitted to the hospital to deliver our baby the next day was crippling. I went upstairs and curled on the bed while Tommy called our parents and close friends. When we arrived at the hospital, I checked in at the Labor and Delivery door and sat to the side waiting while happy, excited, full term women filed by, their joy a stark contrast to my sorrow.

Both these experiences are things I’ll never “get over” in the sense that I’ll never forgot those moments. The passage of time doesn’t take away the pain, it doesn’t make me grieve these losses less each year. As long as I’m on this side of heaven, I will miss my friend and her sweet smile and genuine laugh. I will wonder about the baby we named Addison and mourn the memories we never made together.

However, I do not allow grief to define my memories of these people or grow so entrenched that I become bitter at what these losses denied me. In the early days, it was difficult to comprehend how life kept going for so many people while I sat in heavy memories. I felt left behind but had no desire to catch up. For me, it wasn’t about trying to get away from grieving. It was just doing what I could that day, stopping when I needed to, and allowing the tears to flow.

Probably the most comforting thing in those times was remembering I wasn’t alone. The God who walks beside me daily is also the omniscient God who knows the future. He doesn’t leave us, he knows our sorrow, he offers a peace that we can’t fully understand.

The Psalms are a great source of comfort as walk the road of grief. I repeated Psalm 23 to myself over and over. Psalm 71:1-3 reminds us we can trust in God. Psalm 121 tells of God’s help to us, how he never sleeps but keeps us. Psalm 139 speaks to the way God knows us, forms us, and is everywhere. The Bible is filled with hope we can cling to when we face sorrow. Even when people don’t know how to comfort, God does through His Word and his promise to never leave us or forsake us.

If you are experiencing grief, whether from something past or that you are currently in the midst of, I want to encourage you. Don’t be afraid to bring your sorrow before the Lord. Tell him your struggles, ask for his help, and trust him to provide your strength. Keep reading the Bible and write encouraging passages on notecards to leave throughout your home. Grief will still show itself on anniversaries and in random remembrances and it’s okay. Grief isn’t something to be overcome; it’s something we live with but don’t allow to control us. It’s another way we lean on God and trust him to carry us.

Loss and grief are difficult and in this broken world, they will never go away. But lean on the God of all comfort who knows you and loves you. There is grace and hope through him, for today and all your coming tomorrows.

Photo by Sandy Millar on Unsplash

Making Goals with Open Hands

It’s the new year and some people might be brave enough to make resolutions this year.

With everything going crazy in 2020, I know many people are more hesitant to make a list, plan, etc. And that’s certainly understandable! There were many things on my own calendar that were cancelled in the chaos of last year.

However, I don’t think all planning for 2021 needs to go up in smoke. Maybe we just need to think about it a different way. Go into the year with palms up, hands open, ready to change and modify.

I will say it again for those who missed it: I’m a planner!! Crossing things out of my agenda last March-July was hard. Especially since I love using fancy pens and markers {I would put the winking emoji here if I could}. Making plans just to have them cancelled, everything up in the air and unknown and uncontrollable was very difficult for me. And basically the entire year I was afraid to tell plans to my kids or write them with those fancy pens because they so often weren’t able to happen.

But the frustrations of 2020 will not keep me from thinking about and dreaming up goals for 2021. But I have a different mindset about the point of goals and the benefit of making them.

As I’m thinking through goals for this year and waiting with anticipation and trepidation for what it holds, here’s the process I’m following.

• Prayer. Before I write anything I want to do/accomplish, I ask God to convict me of areas I need to grow in, bring what he wills in my path, and help me seek humility above all else. This isn’t MY year. This isn’t MY life. It’s God’s, and I want to be right where he would have me.

• Write. This can be a list of things to accomplish in different categories (spiritual, health, family, bucket list, etc.), it can be a long journal entry of what I’m praying for this year, it can be a diagram of what to do/when/how. The main thing is I get it on paper! Then I decide what I can realistically do in a year with my current life (family, church, homeschooling, working, housework…).

• Talk. Tommy and I chat about projects we can tackle together, trips we want to make, things we would like to do. I also ask the kids. Usually their suggestions are a little unrealistic (visit Norway and Sweden, recreate dinosaur DNA, build an American Girl room in our house….) but they also request things like camping trips, playdates, sleepovers with Grammy or Nana. Family and memories are so important to me and I want to make room for those too!

I know goal planning isn’t for everyone. I’m not super strict with myself but I do like to sit and think and consider how God would have me use my abilities and time and energy throughout the year. Of course, those things can all change. Maybe we’ll be given extra time {think quarantine} or maybe we’ll walk through a trial with illness or family and not get anything from our list marked off.

For me, it’s not just about the end goal or accomplishing my list — although I love checking things off lists! It’s also about how God grows me and the things I learn through the events of the year. I certainly learned patience and trust, waiting for God’s time and will, and my need for rest and fellowship in 2020. None of those were things on MY to-do for last year but Gods knows best.

Going into 2021, I’m praying, writing, and talking about goals and desires and dreams. But I’m holding them in open, out stretched hands and I might start using a pencil.

Photo by Hayley Maxwell on Unsplash

With a Thankful Heart

It’s the week of Thanksgiving, one of my favorite holidays.

I try to keep a list of gratitude all year but for this week, what I’m thankful for comes to the front of my mind. It’s a good practice and habit to recite to others and ourselves what God has done for us. But it’s also important for us to remember and give thanks for Who God is.

With everything going on in the world in 2020, I’ve felt a special pull to rejoice in Who God is and the confidence I can have — even in times of chaos — because of Him. As we go into Thursday and through the end of the year, take time to praise and thank God for Who He is and what He has promised. Here are a few prompts to get you started:

God is…

Compassionate

Faithful

Just

Patient

Everlasting

Worthy

Holy…

God is also the giver of good gifts and because of that, we can praise Him for all the blessings we experience…

Family

Home

Music

Friends

Ability to worship

Ability to pray

Health…

Let’s leave 2020 with a grateful heart and a long list of what we are thankful for.

Photo by Wisconsin Pictures on Unsplash

Hospitality in a Socially Distanced World

One of the strange things about this whole quarantine thing is how it changed relationships.

As a pastor’s family, we would regularly have people into our home for dinner, brunch, chats, playdates, and parties. We have always viewed our home as a part of our ministry and since March, it’s been difficult to use it as such.

We realize that different people are comfortable with different things; we have friends who wear masks all the time, who take six feet of distance seriously, and we also have friends who don’t mind a quick hug and maskless visits. Tommy and I have talked about how we go forward, respecting the boundaries and feelings of others while still showing hospitality and concern.

And we’ve come to the conclusion that it all comes down to grace. We step forward and ask if they would be comfortable coming to our home. And if they say no, we graciously accept it and move on. As humans, we have a tendency to take things personally. A no for any reason is viewed as some kind of personal rejection. But in this time of pandemic, we can’t take affront at others choices. We need to be gracious and caring.

The true gift of being hospitable is that it isn’t about the person showing hospitality. It’s about the person receiving it. Just like gift giving, if we give gifts because we want to be praised or loved or seen, the value of the gift is diminished. Instead, we give gifts to show love, appreciation, and because we enjoy helping others. We have people to our homes for the same reasons; not because we want recognition for how amazing we are but because we want to demonstrate care and love for those invited.

The difficulty comes now. How do you show hospitality when you aren’t comfortable opening your home? Or when those you invite politely decline for social distancing. Or maybe your state has limited what you are allowed to do. Does hospitality cease in the times of COVID? I hope not. In fact, I believe hospitality is important now more than ever.

We feel disconnected, lonely, absent from each other lives. Studies have shown depression is on the rise as events are cancelled, visits postponed, vacations impossible, and people confined to their home. We need to share hope and love and encouragement in Christ like never before. And that might mean how we show hospitality looks a little different now. Here are some ideas to encourage others when faced with isolation.

1. Send notes. I love getting mail, even a postcard, and I know other people do to. It takes a little effort to write and stamp and address and mail a letter but the encouragement is just as heartfelt. My kids loved drawing pictures that we sent to some elderly people from church to brighten their day.

2. Call or text. I have friends who regularly check up on me via technology. We text Bible verses, prayer requests, give life updates on Marco Polo and Messenger, send GIFs. It’s all about letting people know we think and care about them.

3. Socially Distanced coffee. If the weather is still nice, meet at a park or outdoor restaurant for a quick catch up.

4. Drop off treats. Put tasty treats, candle, lotion, etc. in a gift bag and leave it on someone’s front porch. Or wrap up homemade bread or cookies and deliver it. Even if you don’t see their smiling faces of gratitude, the gesture will be appreciated.

It might require thinking outside the box of what we consider being hospitable but really, it’s the thought, the time, the action that makes the difference. Hospitality doesn’t have to be having people into our homes. It is anything we do for others. And we can still be thoughtful even with the wild ride that 2020 has been.

Photo by Kate Macate on Unsplash

The Idols We Create

This last weekend, Tommy canceled our Netflix subscription.

It was something we had talked about and debated off and on for awhile. We grew increasingly frustrated that we would sit down to watch something and then scroll through hundreds of options but find nothing we wanted to watch! And often when we would start a program that looked interesting, we would turn it off soon after because of vulgar language and inappropriate content.

Whenever we talked about canceling I would think, “But Netflix is something we’ve had so long.” But finally the day came when it didn’t matter how long we’d subscribed, how much our kids liked certain programs available on it. It just wasn’t worth it anymore.

When I woke up on Monday and Tommy told me he had canceled, I didn’t feel the disappointment I had anticipated. I was relieved in a way. We had weighed the pros and cons, talked about why this was an important decision for our family, and stuck with it.

But it did make me consider something rather ugly in myself: had Netflix been an idol for me? I didn’t feel like I had worshipped the streaming service or given it too much of my life. But the very fact that I had made excuses to myself for why we still needed to subscribe left a bad taste in my mouth.

I knew a lot of the programs were nasty.

I knew we watched maybe 8% of the content available because the rest wasn’t worth watching.

But still, there was that tug on me that “we’d always had this so shouldn’t we just keep doing it?”

You see, when we first got Netflix 12 years ago, we went through a whole list of why we wanted to spend money on this new streaming thing. For one, being in ministry, we found ourselves at the church five out of seven nights a week. So when we wanted to sit and watch something together {at dinner or 10pm}, there was nothing on regular TV. We didn’t have a DVR but we could get Netflix through the Xbox. We could also get DVDs in the mail a few times a month for the rare Friday night we were home. In short, it fit our budget and stage of life {no kids yet} and it had things we wanted to watch like older TV shows and movies.

As time went on, it was just something we had. With kids, it was easier to have TV “on demand” than waiting for PBS to run a kids show. It wasn’t until Netflix began producing so many of their originals that the quality really went down and we started debating if it was worth our money. But again, we’d always had it! Our ministry schedule was still crazy and it was nice to know we could watch when we wanted.

But 2020 has proven many things, and not just about Netflix. It’s showed what we are depending on, what matters most to us, what we are willing to deal with because “the world is just that way.” But we decided no. It was not worth it for our family — for the handful of shows we watch over and over — to continue supporting Netflix seeing for ourselves the things and materials they are promoting.

I’m sure some people reading this will wonder what took us so long, others will think we’re overreacting. I’m not writing this to persuade you to cancel Netflix. I’m not trying to make you feel guilty for subscribing or put my family on a pedestal for taking this action.

I’m asking you to think. To look at your life and be completely honest…is there something — maybe something “you’ve always done” — that is taking a place in your life it shouldn’t?

Like I said, at first I didn’t really consider Netflix an idol in my life because I wasn’t spending hours a day watching, it didn’t control my life, I didn’t make decisions based on Netflix. But if I was bored, I would scroll the categories to add things to my watch list. It was always there if I needed a distraction for myself or the kids. I started justifying why we needed it. I used excuses like “We won’t be able to watch this” or “I’ll miss out on that.” But really in defending it, I was showing how it had taken a place in my life I didn’t even realize. And I saw the same thing in my kids, as they asked to get on Netflix every afternoon.

Idols can be anything we put in our affections above God:

• If we consistently choose to read the news over reading the Bible, we have made news an idol.

• If we place being popular at work over being a testimony for Christ, we have made popularity an idol.

• If we choose scrolling social media over prayer, we have made social media an idol.

There are multitudes of examples and often as our stage of life changes, so too do our idols. We must be consistently looking at our lives, how we spend our time, what our “must haves” are, and evaluate the place we give them compared with God. I close with a few verses that have been encouraging and convicting to me lately.

But by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me was not in vain; but I labored more abundantly than they all, yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me. — I Cor. 15:10

So rend your heart, and not your garments; Return to the Lord your God, for He is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness; And He relents from doing harm. — Joel 2:13

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith. — Rom. 12:1-3

Photo by Mollie Sivaram on Unsplash

Finding Beauty in the Little Things

The last few months have been filled with so many stresses and anxieties, at times I found it difficult to focus on something positive.

Everything seemed to be a loaded conversation. Everything was polarizing. {Still is, I guess, but I’ve learned to tune it out.} So much bad news and sorrow and unkindness and complete foolishness. People using their platforms to promote division.

Time was so full of stuff. Before the world literally shut down, I felt like I had so much going on. So much to do and rush around for. Things seemed busy but when I considered why, there was never a good answer. We were just busy. I felt behind and not as together as other people, like I was always having to catch up.

Then I began doing something I should have done long ago. I started appreciating small glimpses of joy and beauty that I had overlooked before. Maybe it was something that didn’t seem beautiful at first glance or it was an emotional beauty rather than a physical one.

The best way I found to do this was to watch my two year old. She is an exuberant and excited child anyway but her pure joy over finding “poly polies” {potato bugs/roly polies}, watching ants, talking and waving to birds always brought a smile. Maybe because as adults we see so many things as a nuisance or bother or not worth our time, but as I stopped and considered what she was marveling at, I began appreciating them more too. And wondering what makes such small things — both in size and supposed purpose — so incredible.

Did you know an ant can carry 50 times its own body weight?

Did you know Monarch butterflies use the sun to navigate?

God designed and created so many amazing things in our world but most of them get passed by because we’re too busy to stop and wonder. They seem small, trivial compared to our worries and schedules. And yet they are there. Surrounding us in so many places.

I’ve been trying to restore a wonder in the way I see things. To not let the ordinary pass by without a glance. To look at the world and experience it as if seeing it for the first time. I recently told Tommy I wish I could go back and read some of my favorite books again, for the first time. To relive the story without knowing what would happen or how the author would weave words and emotions together so expertly. It’s one of the hardest things about finishing a great book.

But at the same time, I believe it’s possible to still enjoy — even anticipate — books and scenes we are familiar with. The brightness of seeing it for the first time doesn’t have to dim. We just have to keep ourselves from growing complacent. To not be so jaded by the world that we roll our eyes and rush by everything, just eager to mark off our to-do list and keep up with all the social media induced expectations. And cultivating a wonder in the ordinary things makes the worries and troubles and fights in the world take second place, if any place at all. When we spend our time looking for and reveling in the beauty of little things, we don’t have time for petty arguments and we want to spread the joy we’ve found to others.

Part of resting in life is trusting that God has things under control. We follow his will for us {Prov. 3:5-6}, we obey his commandments and seek him, and we leave anxiety behind {I Peter 5:7}. When we aren’t worried and caught up in all the worldly things, it’s easier to look around and see the amazing creations God has put before us. And we start the recognize the little things he gives…

Sunsets in pink, orange, and purple

Bees landing effortlessly on flower petals

Hummingbirds beating the air

Snow dusted on mountaintops

Smiles covered in chocolate ice cream

Laughter and giggles while swinging higher

The joy of learning a new skill well

Sweet times with good friends

The world is full of simple, beautiful, ordinary things. But often we need to stop and look to fully enjoy them and praise the Creator of it all.

Photo by Marian Florinel Condruz on Unsplash

Growing in Grace

We homeschool our children. We chose to do that for many different reasons {read more about why here}. But ultimately, when we tell people that we homeschool, I’ll receive looks of compassion and long suffering and hear, “You must be such a patient person.”

My gut reaction is to laugh in their face. But my mom raised me to be polite so I smile and reply, “Not always.” You see, for all the reasons I teach my kids, being patient isn’t one of them.

When we decided on home education, it was the simplest decision and the hardest decision to make. Simple because I love watching my kids learn, I want to know what they struggle with and who they hang out with and what they are exposed to. Hard because I knew it would require sacrifice. It meant my time and energy every morning would be wrapped up in their education and needs. Some days are still hard but I never regret the decision to homeschool. It’s taught me just about as much as I’ve taught my kids, only in a deeper sense than reading and math go.

In our state, I needed to fill out an affidavit to file with the county giving my intention to homeschool and take responsibility for my children’s education. I didn’t fill it out flippantly; the gravity of what I was committing to weighed on me. On part of the affidavit, I was asked what the name of our school was. I paused to consider. Names are something I don’t take lightly. A name, a title, speaks volumes about what you want to stand for and represent. And I’m a classic over thinker, non decisive person.

Finally, I landed on Growing in Grace Academy. Not because I think we’ve arrived and we’re waiting for the world to catch up. But because we continually need to do it! One secular definition for grace is, “the manifestation of favor to an individual” but the biblical definition is, “receiving a gift I don’t deserve.” I want my kids to learn to demonstrate grace to others and remember the grace that God has already lavishly bestowed on them.

We have a warped view that grace is for salvation and then we keep walking. But grace continues to follow us through the sanctification process!! We never outgrow our need for grace!! And God abundantly provides it. In the same way, we need to show grace to others. Even if we feel they don’t deserve our forgiveness, our love, our empathy. We show up and say, “God offers you grace and so do I.” And we pray for them and forgive and don’t allow bitterness to take root.

Naming our school Growing in Grace is a daily reminder of what I want to be doing and how I want to be an example to my kids. I want to show them I need grace and I also give grace. I forgive bad attitudes and love them through their struggles. I ask for forgiveness and apologize when I raise my voice. I remind them no one is perfect and we all fall short. We all need grace and we all need to give grace.

So as we homeschool, as I go about my mornings correcting spelling words, handwriting form, and grammar structure, I always have the amazing gift of grace before me. And I strive to show it, live it out, grow in it through my teaching and life. I get multiple chances a day to try and — with God’s grace — I pray I show it to those around me.

Photo by Maarten Deckers on Unsplash.

Trust the God of the Bible

The world is a crazy place right now.

I usually don’t follow the news. I’ll read major headlines and I read a newsjournal magazine each week with a rundown of what’s going on in the world. But I’m not keeping up everyday. However, what’s going on now with COVID-19 is impossible to close off from.

In the midst of stopped plans, schedules, and routines, I’ve been attempting to fill my mind with God’s truth instead of the anxiety that swells around. I KNOW God is in control. I KNOW this doesn’t surprise him. I KNOW my plans aren’t the end all be all of life. But sometimes, when we’ve come to rely and depend on our ability to plan and control and do what we want, KNOWING something needs to sink in deeper.

In my Bible reading plan for the year, I’ve been traveling the wilderness with the Israelites so far. In my last week of reading, I came across some incredible verses that reminded me of who God is. Let me share just one with you. In the opening chapters of Deuteronomy, Moses is reminding the Israelites what has happened over the past 40 years. From leaving Egypt to refusing to enter the Promised Land, from wandering in the desert to disobeying God, he lays their not so glamorous history before them. Then in chapter 4, Moses commands obedience, forbids idolatry, and tells them {again} about the amazing God who has guided them all those stumbling, complaining years.

…know therefore today, and lay it to your heart, that the Lord is God in heaven above and on the earth beneath; there is no other. {Deut. 4:39}

Consider those words in the context of where we are today. God is in control of heaven above and earth beneath today just as much as he was for the Israelites gearing up to claim the Promised Land. Consider also what the Israelites were facing. God had promised them victory over their enemies if they obeyed his commands and obeyed him. Because God is sovereign over everything, not just his people, he tells them that he will strike fear in their enemies and that he is preparing the way for the Israelites to defeat the enemy. Because he is God; there is no other.

A few days after I read that verse and started writing this post, there was a 5.7 earthquake near where I live that woke up my family to 15 of the longest seconds of my life. We are safe, there was no damage, but my heart was racing all day. As a mom with young kids, I fought back my tears and put on a smile and quoted verses all day about not being afraid. That night, I tried to return to this post and finish writing it but I just couldn’t. I stared at the words of Deuteronomy 4:39 and the paragraphs that I had typed a mere 24 hours before the earthquake and I couldn’t stop repeating to myself, “There is no other God. He is Lord of heaven and earth. Yesterday, today, always.” After just going through the strongest and longest earthquake I’ve ever experienced, those truths took a new meaning to me.

As a writer, it’s always interesting to go back and read my thoughts and relive in a way what God has taught me in the past. {As a side note, it is one of the reasons I’m a huge advocate of journaling, even if you aren’t publishing your writing. I’ve been reminded of so many lessons and blessings by keeping journals of my thoughts, prayers, and daily life.} But to read this reminder of Who God is in the midst of walking through the great unknown that we all find ourselves in…it brought me humbly seeking God and KNOWING he is in control in a whole new way.

This week, and I’m sure the weeks to come, are proving to me that I am weak but he gives strength. I need grace and he pours it over me. I can trust him with the weeks and months full of unknowns and he will not leave me.

When was the last time you really KNEW with your head and your heart Who God is? Have you thanked him for his faithfulness recently? Do you, today, know and lay on your heart that he is Lord of heaven above and earth beneath?

Photo by Davide Cantelli on Unsplash

Why Rest?

I love cats for many reasons but one of them is their uncanny ability to sleep whenever, wherever they want. I had a cat when I was younger that I could put into baby doll clothes and push in a stroller…and he would sleep the whole time! Any patch of sun, any comfy blanket thrown on the couch. I’ve never had a cat that had trouble resting and sleeping.

I’ve been thinking about rest a lot lately.

What it is.

Why we need it.

Why we refuse it.

Somehow in our culture, we’ve come to associate rest with laziness. If we aren’t busy doing something, we have no drive, no ambition. We’re missing opportunities, we’re wasting resources or energy.

We don’t want to admit we need rest and chances to refresh because others will boast about all the projects they’re doing, all the directions they’re moving in. Part of us feels guilty about resting. We sit down and think about the dishes in the sink, the week worth of laundry to be washed. We choose limited routines for our family but are afraid our kids are missing out on something fun. We limit our work load but fret the industrious workaholics will get the promotion.

So avoiding rest is more than, “I like to be busy.” It’s a fundamental mindset that is shaped by personality, driven by cultural expectation, and championed in society. When I open Facebook or Instagram, I can almost guarantee an ad will pop up for “develop your own business, find a side hustle, make your free time make money!”

Whatever happened to free time being free? To rest, read, relax? Now every moment is scheduled or we’re supposed to have a plan to make it productive.

Isn’t it all exhausting? And the thing I find most interesting is when I talk with friends, how busy we are and how tired we are always comes up! Granted, most of us have little kids so sleepless nights are just going to happen. But when we fill the moments we could be resting with activities, social media scrolling, TV marathons, things we don’t have to do but somehow we feel we have to do them — it shouldn’t be a surprise that we are running on fumes.

We were made to rest. From the very beginning of the world, God showed us that we would need rest (Gen. 2:2-3). Even though it wasn’t a command until generations later (Ex. 20:8-11), God showed us right after creation that rest is good.

I’m still sorting out for myself what rest means and looks like and how I can accomplish it in this go-go-go culture. But for now, think about this: going into the weekend, what’s one thing you can do — or choose to not do — that will give you a moment of rest? Is there something you can do today that will free up space tomorrow?

Photo by Simon Matzinger on Unsplash

Giving Away Grace

Over the weekend I was able to travel to Indianapolis and attend a women’s Christian conference. This was my third time going and I do enjoyed the speakers and time with great friends. Every session of this conference taught me something, showed me something, challenged me in some way. And it was wonderful to head back to the hotel with some friends after a full day of listening and just pour out everything I learned and hear what challenged them and cry and grow together.

I can’t really choose a favorite session or speaker because they all spoke to me in a different but good ways, however, one session I plan to rewatch when it hits YouTube is the one on grace. I love the word grace — the meaning, the way it works in lives and changes us — it truly is an extraordinary gift from God. I love it so much it’s on my author tagline {Grace. Hope. Everyday.} and we gave one of my daughters the middle name Grace.

The problem is we seem to limit grace to salvation. When we are witnessing to someone or marveling at our own salvation, we are quick to point out it is by grace alone. Nothing we do. Nothing we earn. Just plain grace from a Holy God who loves us and gives us the amazing gift of grace that we don’t deserve. But after we accept this free gift, we tend to keep grace to ourselves. Maybe we don’t realize we still need it daily. Maybe we don’t know we can continue to share grace with others. Or maybe we’re just plain selfish. But the truth is, grace is not a one time occurrence. We continually need it and God continually gives it. {James 4:6} And guess what?! Other people need it after salvation too! Now we can’t give them the same grace God bestows on us but we can show them love, patience, acceptance when they haven’t done anything to earn those responses from us. And isn’t that what grace is?

Back to the conference. The speaker gave an illustration that caused us to chuckle but also struck a nerve. She said sometimes we walk around in need of a toe-stub amount of grace. That’s not a whole lot and then we look over at a friend who’s lying on a stretcher, she can’t even move she’s in need of so much grace during a certain trial or stage of life. We might be tempted to say, “Don’t worry, God, I don’t really need this grace. Give it all to her and I’ll just stumble along until I need more than a stubbed toe amount.”

Meanwhile, our friend on the stretcher might look at us and think, “Why in the world does she need grace? She only stubbed her toe! She’ll live. She can do anything she wants, she doesn’t need grace from me or anyone else. Her life is fine. I’m the one in need here!”

Both of these responses are wrong. The person who says she doesn’t need grace until something big happens is trying to live life without God’s help, trusting in herself to make it through the everyday. She appears to be self sacrificing and thoughtful of others but in reality, she’s refusing the grace God offers because she doesn’t believe her problems are big enough to need God.

Her friend on the stretcher believes her unique, huge, difficult circumstances demand more grace than others around her. Maybe she’s bitter or angry when she hears them talk about their situations because it all seems so small compared with what she’s facing. She wonders why they need grace and resents them.

The truth, and the point the speaker was making, is we always need grace. For salvation, of course. But everyday after we must be dependent on God’s gift of grace. {Heb. 4:16} Without it, we start depending on ourselves and thinking we can do things in our own strength and wisdom. Grace meets us in our weakness and carries us along. {II Cor. 12:9-10}

And we also need to come alongside others and show them grace. Maybe you have a friend in a deep valley of life. When she doesn’t text you back, never wants to meet for lunch, instead of brushing her aside you can show grace through your prayers and continued friendship, even if you’re the only one trying. {I Peter 4:10} And if we’ve just stubbed our toe and we’re okay but feel on the verge of stumbling deeper, we can ask for prayer, look to God, and he will abundantly provide what we need.

Think about this in closing: God doesn’t just give us the exact amount of grace we need for a day. He lavishes it on us, giving more than we need at a time. Our cup overflows with his goodness. {Eph. 1:7-8} And what do we do with this abundant grace? We pass it on to those around us. God isn’t going to run out. We don’t have a set allotment of grace for our lives so we need to keep some in reserve. We can give grace to others in gratitude for the grace already showered upon us.

Photo by Ina Soulis on Unsplash.

Taking Time for Words and Pie

It all started with Amelia Bedelia.

This past weekend my mom took my two older kids for the afternoon with an interesting challenge in mind: make a lemon meringue pie from scratch. After reading the first Amelia Bedelia book - where she makes a mess of everything except her famous lemon meringue pie - my oldest daughter was enamored with the idea of making that same dessert. And since making pies isn’t foreign to my mom, she requested that Grammy buy lemons, pull out her recipe book, and start baking!

My son decided to join the adventure because it meant going to Grammy’s house! Of course he wanted to tag along! So it was with excited smiles from the kids that I dropped them off on an autumn Saturday.

Several hours later, my dad dropped them back home with the words, “It took three hours to make two pies but they did it.” And for the next hour my son explained to me how he had been the only one strong enough to squeeze the juice from the lemons. Sister tried and gave up but he could do it. And he had squeezed every lemon. My daughter talked about rolling dough, eating pie crust cookies (Mom bakes the bits of cut off crust with cinnamon and sugar) and homemade lemonade, and spending the day with Grammy.

From an adult perspective it was a fairly unremarkable day, made a little more difficult by ‘helping hands’. But for my kids it was an event. When we finally tasted the pies after church on Sunday neither of them liked it - too sour, too tart, too yellow - but they were very proud to let everyone know how they had contributed to the making of the dessert.

I think sometimes in life we want to do grand gestures for and with others. Invite them for a five course meal, go on a weekend trip, buy the toy our kids are begging for. But sometimes the efforts that seem the smallest to us are the ones that make the biggest impact. Sending a card on their birthday, taking time to listen, texting a greeting if they’re sick, making time to bake.

Ephesians 4:29 says, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”

Have you ever thought of building others up and showing them grace merely with your words? Both written and spoken words have such power, to build up or to tear down. It might seem like the simplest thing we can do - to speak loving, encouraging words - but we so often overlook it. It doesn’t take money or special skills. It just takes time and a little effort.

When my kids came home bursting at the seams with excitement and pride over their pie making afternoon, they were obviously delighted with the day. My mom had fun too, although probably of a different kind. But isn’t that the way of doing for others?

Photo by Anvision on Unsplash