I am {Not} Enough

There has been a trend in recent years to put uplifting sayings on journals, shirts, mugs, basically anything. I’m sure you’ve seen them…

Believe you can and you will

She believed she could so she did

Dream high

Keep calm and {insert anything here}

Ask me after my coffee….

While these aren’t bad, there is one that always bothers me. I usually see it in reference to women who are longing for a husband or a better job, seeking affirmation from peers, deep in discouragement, etc. But it simply is “I am Enough” or “You are Enough.”

Think about that for a minute. You are wearing a shirt {or drinking from a mug} that states you are all you need.

I don’t know if you’ve ever tried to ride the “You are enough” train but it’s discouraging! Give me one hour of trying to parent in my own strength, wisdom, patience, and you will see how this statement in practice doesn’t work. We are not enough by ourselves. We will fail again and again and hurt those around us when we live with this mantra.

In my mind there is really no way to defend this sentiment biblically. In fact, we read Paul in Philippians 3 reminding people of his credentials of “being enough” according to the Jews yet it meaning nothing for salvation. Here’s how Paul sums it up in Philippians 3:7-8a “But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ. Indeed, I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.”

Paul counted nothing that he had done as gain for Christ. The well-known passage in II Corinthians 12 tells us that Paul had something he asked God to take from him — perhaps a speech problem or a physical ailment — but God denied him. “‘But he {God} said to me {Paul}, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” {II Cor. 12:9}

Paul saw he was far from enough on his own. Salvation, wisdom, strength, discernment. We need to rely on God. We need to humbly say, “I am Not Enough!”

Part of the struggle we have with finding true rest is the belief that we have to be doing. If we are enough, then everything goes — or falls — because of us. If we stop, if we rest, if we look to someone else, we will cease being enough. And for some, that is frightening. But is should be a relief! To not carry the weight of life ourselves but to turn it over to God because we know we aren’t enough to save ourselves!

Our culture is self-seeking, self-promoting, independent. While working and knowing how to care for ourselves is not bad, we need to be careful to not become so independent we turn from God. We must acknowledge that we are not enough, for this life or the next.

Photo by Lili Popper on Unsplash

Be Kind

Does it really need to be said? Apparently it does.

It has grieved and.troubled me how rational, Bible believing people have turned to anger, suspicion, and hate toward other Christians and unsaved alike. And to compound the issue, they are taking to social media where anyone can see their hatred and rage. I recently observed an online conversation that started with, “A video I posted was removed by Facebook” and within 20 comments had escalated to name calling, threats of unfriending, and some really angry remarks that had nothing to do with the original post.

So let’s pause a moment and gain some wisdom from a rabbit.

In the animated movie, Bambi, a rabbit named Thumper makes an observation about the fawn which is true but not necessarily nice. The mother rabbit asks, “What did your father tell you this morning?” To which Thumper replies reluctantly, “If you can't say something nice, don't say nothing at all.” What wisdom from a bunny! My Me-Ma had another saying along these lines that she loved to pop into conversation when someone was struggling: “Pretty is as pretty does.” Meaning act pretty (kind) if you want to be pretty on the outside.

But that seems to be the farthest thing from anyone’s mind right now. Everyone cares about stating their opinion and sharing why anyone who disagrees is wrong.

So indulge me in a little refresher course on what kindness is.

1) Kindness is speaking in love. Sometimes we need to share the truth with others and oppose what they are saying BUT that is in reference to people speaking against God, glorifying sin/sinful behavior, etc. And even then, it needs to be in an attitude of love. At this point, we could stop and read all of I Corinthians 13 but let’s just focus on verse 4: “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant.” Don’t forget Ephesians 4:32: “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”

2) Kindness is sensitive. Do you know the situation/circumstance/life story of every person you contact? We have no idea what other trials or decisions people are facing, especially if we’re only engaging with them on social media. I have been hurt by something someone posted just after a huge trial in my life. It might not have been directed at me personally but the tone and condemnation of what was written hit me at a very fragile time. I know some of you are rolling your eyes, thinking, “If I did that, I’d never post anything. I can’t think of every person’s emotional state before I say something.” It’s true, people are accountable for the way they take things and for their attitude and actions after. But that doesn’t give us the right for angry, insulting remarks. Recognize that people have reasons for choosing to wear a mask/not wear a mask/stay home/go to the park, etc. And it’s not our place to shower criticism or anger on their personal choices.

3) Kindness is humble. Have you ever been wrong? Have you ever passionately stood behind something and then changed your mind as you got older, learned more, etc? We all have and in this current age of technology and information, we receive new information constantly. And it contradicts! And it changes! And the media does have a bias and does report negative, scary news because that is what gets clicks! “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.” (Phil. 2:3) Be careful to not shout your knowledge in an attempt to look smart, thumb your nose at others, or look more spiritual. That is not humility and that is not thinking of others. Philippians 2 is all about the humility of Christ and how we are to follow that example.

4) Kindness is a fruit of the Spirit. We are told in Galatians a list of nine things that should be evident in a Christian’s life. Kindness happens to be one of them. “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.” (Gal. 5:22-23) 

I’m just going to throw this out there for you to consider: if you read something that really burns you up and you want to belittle the author or the person who posted, go to your bathroom and talk to the wall. Or write it all out in a notebook. Do you know how many times I’ve complained or vented frustrations to myself and when it was over, I was very glad I was the only one who heard my angry words? Things spoken in anger are rarely helpful. If you need to get it out, do it alone. The internet doesn’t need more venom.

I know sometimes we post things that aren’t meant to offend; we’re sharing information or articles for people to consider. But if someone posts a comment disagreeing or angry about the article, we need to monitor our response and decide if it’s worth engaging. Every comment doesn’t need a reply. Most people who comment on social media aren’t looking for a real discussion of pros and cons and you probably won’t change their mind, even with a well-crafted response. They just want to get their two cents in. It’s okay to walk away first.

Here’s my last thought on this. On social media, we don’t know who will read what we say. Please be considerate and remember, everyone is struggling to make their own decisions based on what is best for their families and within their states guidelines. Don’t think people are just following the crowds and haven’t given thought to their choices.

Let’s cover ourselves and each other in prayer. Think about your responses before responding. Remember, you’ll be worshiping, going to family picnics, interacting with these people who have witnessed and observed you online. Guard your heart. Trust God. Be humble.

Just be kind.

Photo by Dayne Topkin on Unsplash