A little over a year ago something amazing happened to me.
We were in the midst of putting our house up for sale, we had an offer in on a house we loved, and we had a one month old baby in addition to our two others kids. There were ministries at church, homeschooling, making family time, and trying to stay sane.
I hadn’t started this blog because writing seemed like a far off dream. Definitely something I couldn’t give daily time to. Then — out of the blue — I received a message from an acquaintance who I had written a few questions about writing. She was a published author and I knew her from several different circles but our correspondence had been limited. She asked in her message if I would be willing to contribute a few devotionals for an upcoming publication meant to specifically encourage moms. And she needed them by the end of the month.
I showed the message to Tommy, too stunned to reply. Even though the schedule was packed, he said he thought I should do it. He volunteered to help out with whatever I needed in the coming month. I took a few breaths and wrote back asking for more information and that I was very interested.
Over the next few days, I thought about what encouraged me as a mom and how it related to gospel truth. I wrote using my phone in every small moment I could grab. I dictated ideas and Bible verses while packing boxes. With Tommy’s help and lots of grace I was able to write two devotionals and get them sent in on time. Just in time for Mother’s Day last year, the booklet was published and we moved into our new home.
Then a busy summer hit, and we started homeschool in the fall and life just took off again. And my writing once again took a backseat to everything else in life. In our new home, I have a beautiful office in a spare bedroom and a few times a week I carve out enough time to write a blog post, pursue a new idea, journal some thoughts.
Although my efforts seem small, my goal is to keep going. To keep doing what I love and feel called to. Sometimes we look at what others are doing and imagine the joy of being there ourselves. But it seems impossible because of different circumstances and life stages. We wonder when this will pass and we can pursue the next thing — the thing we really want. I’ve had those moments. The wondering when my baby will sleep through the night so I have energy to wake up early and get things done before the kids join me. The waiting as I query publishers about a project I’ve been working on for years.
But the truth I’ve come to recognize is that even when we are in seasons of waiting and it looks like our passions will remain dormant forever, we are still growing and learning. And in that personal growth our passions and desires grow too. I might not be able to sit and write as often as I want but when I get the chance, my fingers have learned to fly! The number of words I can pour onto a page in an hour is much greater than it used to be. My experiences have changed what I write and the tone I use. Feedback from editors on the few projects I’ve done has sharpened my skills and helped me recognize errors I’m prone to.
The waiting is not wasted time. The writing I scribble into journals and dictate into my phone on walks is not wasted. It is all used to teach me and grow me and change me so that when the time is right, I’ll be better equipped to use my passion for God.
Photo by Neven Krcmarek on Unsplash